People

Photograph of me taken on 1.5.2009 (at Church of St Anthony of Padua), the 9th month I was pregnant...

It is said that the natural resources of Singapore is nothing but People, a human being.

What is a human being?  We asked about how the chicken comes about?  Is it from egg first or from chicken first?  We have many questions about life as well.  However we could not answer them.  Did you really think about our meaning of life at all?  What is the purpose of living in this world even?

I questioned it.  It was my paternal grandmother's death that I had experienced a life lost.  So that was the ultimate destiny of a person!  Singapore, our common destiny, our shared destiny, death.  

But how does people come about?  Though I studied and read on books about the process of pregnancy, I was blinded to think that I can abort the 'heart' (the six weeks old foetus).  That was a precious human being, from the day it was conceived!  How precious it was for people who do not even have a chance to have a baby.  Some people tried so hard for babies and yet they had none.  Yet, I was blinded.  It never dawn on me that I was actually killing a precious life like that!

 

The human life starts from the fertilization of the egg with the sperm.  It slowly develops into more cell division and ultimately the heart is formed and subsequently everything develops slowly in the mother's womb.  The 'making of a human being' takes nine precious months.  So the human lives should be treasured.  

 

Photograph of Isaac and me taken on 1.8.2009

I bared the hardship of pregnancy and successfully gave birth to Isaac.  That is how a life comes about from a tiny egg that met the sperm grow in the womb, and eventually into a full term baby.  Another hardship was the labour pain and eventually all the pushing hard to have the baby come to the world.  So that was the 'making of a people'.

I too was born from my mother's womb.  I grew up, brought up in my mother's house and my parents' are also brought up locally, all within Singapore.  Singapore is a small country and do you really know what is the right way to live our life?  

John 14:6 --  Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

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Destiny

 

2002: Family Photograph taken at Genting Highlands

I thought that Destiny lies in our hands but in actual fact, destiny lies in God's hands. 

We were separated for 2 years.  He had a new girlfriend before Clara was born.  I was so devastated and lost at that time when I gave birth to Clara.  However, Clara's birth was the easiest and very natural.  There was no need for vacuum suction and forceps.  I tried to give breastmilk, but too stressful.  So for Clara, she drank more of commercial milk that the maid helped to make.  

During the 2 years of separation, later on I had two relationships.  Christopher was very good to me.  However, Richard learned about it.  Then he desired to come back.  Was that the result of my prayer? It must be.  I never knew he would come back.  

So when he came back, we went Genting Highlands for vacation.  The above photograph was taken there.  I thought that that was our family photograph... 

 

Photograph of Richard and I taken on 30.4.1995 at St Joseph's Church (Bukit Timah)

I was brought up in Singapore, a typical Singaporean who is law abiding. We got registered on 7.1.1995 and we planned to have 2 children, one boy and one girl as what the government always shown in campaigns, 2 is enough.  At that time, we had everything planned, 2 children to be born 2 years of age gap so that I could bring them together to school and bring them back after school.  Last time the education system is such that there were 2 sessions -- morning and afternoon.  

But I was wrong.  Education system changed.  Nothing is forever the same.  Everything changes with time.  Soon there was only one session of school.  There were no more afternoon session.  

Knowing Richard, going dating with him and going to vacation and so on, we encountered fortune tellers.  Some we approached, some (or rather one or two) just came to us.  In my memory what the fortune teller said was in my mind.  But I just could not believe.  I decide everything myself and I control everything myself.  How is it possible that I can have 3 children?  That was what the fortune teller told me -- "You will have 3 children."  He added that Richard will have more children than me.  He said that Richard would be rich while I had just enough money to spend.  I will encounter help in my life.  I just could not believe so much about this fortune teller after he said I will have 3 children.  It seems too many for me...  

Family Planning: I did not know that Catholic is not supposed to use condom, but that was what we used to do.  At times Richard would use the natural method of counting the safe period.  But I got pregnant in the year 2002!  Who control our hormones now I think of that and who control our cycles?  Clara was conceived naturally since we wanted two children, and even having 2 before the age of 30 so that we can be waived from income tax (the policy at that time).  

The 2 children were still young and I was pregnant again!  It was torturous to be pregnant.  Being pregnant, I would have to lie down most of the time.  I could not do much work.  Thinking of that and my 2 other children need me, I did not know what to do.  Then suddenly a thought came to my mind:  "My sister also have abortion before!  And look at her, nothing happened to her!"   With this thought, my mind was make up.  

Soon I put IUD (a kind of family planning) inside my womb, as suggested by the doctor.  However some years later, it gave me problems and the gynae said it was rejecting from my body.  So it was taken out.  And from then on I am 'natural' again.  

And so the years passed by until Jesus came...

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A New Life

 It was a great day.  The weather was very good.  After sending the children for catechism class, Richard and I cycled to Waterfront.  There we saw so many monkeys.  People were feeding them food -- watermelon, orange, and so on.  I spotted this mother monkey carrying her baby. 

7.9.2008: Somewhere around Waterfront a monkey carrying her baby was spotted.
 

 

7.9.2008 : Picture of a special blue bird that I sighted as I was cycling on the way to Sembawang Park.

After Waterfront, we cycled to Sembawang Park.  On the way, I spotted this bird which was flying, and when I noticed it, it just stopped for me to take photograph of it!  How amazing!  And this was the first time I spotted this kind of blue bird.  

We continued to cycle and soon we reach Sembawang Park.  We were both sweating.  This was the place we had our wedding photo shoot. 

7.9.2008 : Picture of a Richard and I standing at the spot where we had our wedding photograph. 

Little do I know that I was pregnant by then.  It was only later that I had missed my menstruation and had the 'symptoms' of pregnancy that I knew I was pregnant in the later weeks.  My birthday was the next day.  Richard told me that that was a birthday present for me.  

30.9.2008 Photograph of ultrasound scan showing the baby's heartbeat

I have a new life ever since Jesus came.  Everyday was a different day.  Little did I know that this new life that I have will result in another new life...

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A Saved Soul

 

Above: 11 April 2010 -- A flock of pigeons at the neighbourhood while we were walking to the church.

11 May 2010 at church of St Anthony of Padua

Jesus loves to share with stories and parables.  In Christianity, there were so many symbolism too.  According to Exemplore, it says that birds have become prominent symbols all throughout the world and across various cultures. They are often seen as the supernatural link between Heaven and the living here on Earth. In certain cultures and religions, like those of the Middle East or Asia, birds represent immortality. In the traditions of the original peoples of North America and in East Indian myth, birds are considered departed souls or spirit messengers. In Christianity, birds can represent peace or may be used to symbolize a saved soul 

Matthew 9:10-17 While Jesus was having dinner at Matthew’s house, many tax collectors and sinners came and ate with him and his disciples.  When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?”   On hearing this, Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” .   

Do you understand what this means?  If I just said, some people might not believe what I said without any proof.  And there was no eye witness.  It happened in the bathroom, it happened while I was awoke and everybody were sleeping.  Who would believe what I said?  Am I in the right mind?  So I encountered all these sightings so that you might believe what I said.  

Jesus is the pure one, depicted in white.  I had NEVER ever seen a white dove before in my life until 11 April 2010.  Of course I had seen white dove in magic show.  But that was what they purchase in commercial.  What I mean is in nature.  So Jesus is the unblemished one.  Yet he had come to mix with the impure ones, as can see from the pigeons.  The white one symbolized Jesus and the mixture of black and white ones symbolized the sinners.  

In the photograph above from church of St Anthony of Padua, Jesus was resurrected from the tomb.  He was dressed in white.  

So I am the lost lamb, a sinner, that Jesus had saved.  Just like Jesus had resurrected, I was dead and was resurrected too.  He had saved my soul.  

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